Jackson turns 4!!!

I know this post is way overdue! I've been trying to stay current and catch up little by little.

OUR LITTLE BOY IS FOUR!!! Oh my goodness, it's so hard to believe.

The last couple of weeks I've been reminded of what I love about 4 year olds. They just say the cutest things! He's still a handful, but he is hilarious!! He knows it too! I need to start writing more of it down. I'm gonna miss his cuteness!

Krispy Kreme birthday doughnuts! I love this tradition!

We had a small birthday party for Jackson with our neighbors and the Barbours on Sunday April 19th. It was so fun to be able to celebrate on his actual birthday!! The best part of all was that my sister Janet and her kids were able to make it down for the party! What a TREAT! Austin, Grant, and Emma were our special guests! We met at a nearby park, played, ate pizza, had cake and ice cream, played, open gifts, played kick ball in the open field, and went home. I do love park parties. Easy, GREAT for the kids, and very little clean up! Perfect! :)

Jackson wanted a Batman cake. This blue icing really did a number on your mouth! :) It was yummy!

Jackson is more of an icing kind of guy than a cake kind of guy. I actually think he had two pieces but only ate the icing off of both of them. Too cute!

It was so fun celebrating out little J! He is a sweetheart, full of life, so loving and we are so blessed to be able to call him our own!

We love you Jackson! Happy 4th Birthday!

she finally said it

Addison said "mama" today for the first time!!!

WOO HOO!!! i've been waiting and hoping...she's almost a year old. i was getting worried. not really...but seriously, it's about time!!!!

she says Dada all the time and says it to Anthony. it's clear she knows what she's saying; but no mama!

today as Anthony was getting her out of the car seat to give her to me, she said it. i didn't hear it so i said it didn't count. :)

this afternoon she said it to me 3 different times. not repeated over and over, just simply looks at me and says mama and then gives the sweetest grin!

made my day!!! :)

there is something really special about that word..."mama". i know you know what i'm talking about! :)

homeschooling

i guess i mentioned in one of my posts recently about our decision to home school. it's not a secret. but i hadn't made a public announcement on the blog. i'm sure it surprised some of you so let me give you the background on this big decision and big change for our family...

i never planned to home school. it had crossed my mind but it was never our plan. public school was our decision. we had considered Christian school but at the time Harrison entered Kindergarten, it was not an option for us financially and knowing that we had 2 children and planned to have another...it would not be a long term option for our family unless i worked. having me home is our priority.

Harrison's kindergarten year in public school was GREAT. we loved his teacher. he thrived at school. it was a wonderful experience and we felt very blessed. we love the year round schedule and never had a second thought about sending him back for 1st grade.

it's been a tough year for Harrison. i could have never predicted or expected all that has occurred with our little man. i feel like things really started around the time he broke his arm. before Christmas his behavior was really struggling. he was starting to have trouble focusing at school and just lost his desire to be there and ability to ENJOY it all together.

i kept feeling the Lord tug on my heart. i kept praying for Harrison and kept feeling like the Lord was asking me to pray about homeschooling. Anthony and i talked about it and we prayed a TON. i didn't tell anyone. i didn't want to hear opinions for or against homeschooling. i knew enough about all of that. i needed the Lord to tell me what he wanted US to do for OUR family. it's different for every family and i didn't want to be influenced by what other families had chosen. i struggled with it. i was very fearful. i didn't want to do it. i felt like it would make my life more complicated and difficult. i felt like it would take away all my free time. everything that i had against it (for me) seemed to be self centered. i was scared to death.

i finally confided in a dear friend and asked for prayer. she encouraged me to confess my fear. it was standing in the way of my knowing what the Lord had for us. so I did. it seemed almost immediate but within a few days Anthony and i truly felt a peace about this terrifying decision! :) i was worried at first what some might think. i have felt very supported though. i recognize this decision is not for every family. i actually never really thought i'd be making this decision either. :) each family has to ask the Lord to direct them when it comes to school. it's a hard decision to know what to do with your precious babies! i do believe God has allowed circumstances to bring us to this point. and i know He does that for each family whether it be public, private, or home school. He's made clear to us what we need to do for Harrison next year.

i say it that way because it's truly how i feel. i don't know about 3rd grade, 4th grade, 7th Grade, Jackson, Addison, etc... all i know is that we are going to home school Harrison next year for 2nd grade and i have a peace that it is what is best for him.

i want him to get back to a love of learning. i want him to feel less stress and pressure...to be less overwhelmed. we need to really work on his heart and some behavior stuff. so much of our time is spent "reacting" and there is so little time to be "proactive" with him...he's away from us most of the week. he leaves us at 8:30am and doesn't return until 4:00pm. he's physically and emotionally exhausted. we want what's best for him and we can honestly say right now the situation he's in is just not best. there are SO many things that have confirmed this decision for us. behavioral, social, issues with classmates, tension with his teacher and teacher's assistant, his feelings of failure and frustrations of being good enough or being able to do a good job. my heart gets heavy when i think of the emotions this little guy is dealing with right now. he is SO SMART! he is SO SWEET! he is SO LOVED...and yet he's having a hard time believing all those things.

we are going to stop. take a break. slow things down. love on him. give him our time and our attention. he's 7. he's too young for this kind of stress and pressure.

i know we've made the right decision. even when i start to fear, the Lord somehow confirms to us our decision.

like i said...i don't know how long. we're gonna take things one year at a time and see where the Lord takes us. He may direct us differently down the road and that is OK.

we've turned Anthony's old home office into a school room. it looks GREAT...pictures to come. we're gonna make it as fun as possible. we'll have school Mon.-Thurs. and take Friday's off. we'll follow a modified year-round schedule because we liked it so much. we hope to join a co-op for parties/fun activities. we won't join a co-op that we will meet with weekly. we want to keep things simple. we have lots of things we're involved in at church that will keep us busy and "social". :) God has put a few wonderful, godly, ladies in my life who have and are homeschooling. they are a wonderful resource and encouragement to me as i prepare for the coming year! isn't it WONDERFUL that He knows who to bring into your life and when!

i feel like i've rambled on here. it was good to get this all down.

i wanted to share my heart as well as fill you all in on this big step of faith for the Williams family! i know it's a shocker for some of you! :)

my little helper

wouldn't you just love to have this little sweetie helping you in the kitchen?

i always forget how much i enjoy having a little baby crawling around in the kitchen. yes, she gets in the way sometimes or needs to be redirected but i love having her at my feet. i love seeing her piddle and explore. i love watching her pull all the tupperware out of 'her' cabinet. i love it. she's a great little helper!

that's a lot of carrots...

the red bowl was filled to the rim before i added the proper amount of carrots to the mixer. isn't that a TON of carrots!

i'm making a carrot cake for my neighbor Mike. he fixed our old computer this past weekend so the kids can have a computer for homeschooling - word processor, games, and internet access. PERFECT!!! what a blessing that will be for us! always nice to have a computer friend who can do wonders with your old computer!

so, Mike's favorite dessert is carrot cake. i've never made one but i've had Katy's and her recipe is AWESOME. if i don't have a good recipe, i always know Katy will. :)

i made my list this morning. while at the store i picked up the 3lbs of carrots i believed the cake called for. i even thought "that sure is a lot of carrots." but what do i know? i'm no carrot cake expert. :)

got home. peeled the carrots. shredded them in the food processor. at least i didn't have to do that by hand, that would have been a job! i kept thinking, why would anyone make a shredded carrot anything without a food processor!!! :) when i saw the bowl of carrots i REALLY thought that was a LOT of carrots for one cake.

i was right. the recipe called for 3 CUPS not 3lbs! HELLO! good thing i caught that before i tossed them all in. i actually think it would have been near impossible to mix that many carrots with anything! ha!

so...i plan to make a carrot salad today. i could probably do that and still make another carrot cake. maybe i'll make carrot cake cupcakes and freeze them. i don't know. maybe i should google recipes that call for shredded carrots. i have plenty to go around! :)

at least we know now!

Jackson in the "wee-walker" - we need to come up with a different name! :)

our little guy has been limping for a week (longer if you count the fact that Mimi and Papa noticed him limping in FL during his visit). we went to an orthopedic last week and it was basically a total waste of my $50.00 specialist copay. we certainly didn't leave with any special information. Jackson said his knee hurt when we would ask so the Dr. did x-ray's on the knee. but that was it. we were told to come back in 2 weeks if it wasn't better but that it was probably growing pains.

i have a problem. i get nervous in a Dr.'s office. i feel like they are the expert and i should just sit there and listen. i always don't ask enough questions and always leave feeling like i need a do over! i think i've confirmed my issue throughout this experience and i'm going to try HARD not to let it happen anymore. i'd be $50.00 richer right now.

the rest of the week he limped, complained that he couldn't run anymore or jump. never acted like he was in pain, just matter of fact about what he could or couldn't do. he seemed to have made peace with his new leg. :) i hated it though. he wasn't himself and if you know Jackson you know he doesn't let anything or anyone slow him down! he is WIDE OPEN! it was so sad to see him lagging behind, frustrated and wanting everyone to wait for him. usually he leaves us in the dust! :) he's been more irritable than usual too. it didn't take me long to know we needed a second opinion!

i called the Pediatrician Monday morning and told her that i felt he needed more x-rays and possibly blood work. we prayed a lot for him over the weekend. i'm not trying to be dramatic but sometimes your mind gets away from you and you start thinking "what if there is something really BAD wrong?" "this is how people find out there's a serious issue...some random problem or illness that no one can figure out and ends up being really bad news". "will i trust the Lord with my baby?" "what makes me think i should get 'good' news every time we go to the Dr?" "will this be THE time we get horrible news...people do get horrible news." i had a lot of praying and trusting to do over the past week.

our appointment was today, 9:30am. she checked him out thoroughly. he looked fine, moved fine, no pain, but still a limp. she sent us over to radiology for x-ray's of his hips, knees, and ankles in both legs. we weren't going to miss it this time. :) she decided we would do the blood work if the x-ray's didn't give us an idea of what was wrong. Jackson and Addison did great. we had to wait a LONG time for the x-ray's. we read and looked through every Highlight's magazine in the office!

the radiologist brought me the films and told me i needed to take them back to my Dr. and at that point i knew something was wrong. did do a lot of praying during the 10 minute drive back over to the Pediatrician. prayed it would be nothing serious and He answered my prayers. he has a fracture in the growth plate at the bottom of the Fibula (down towards the ankle). she said it's a rolling in or twisting injury. we left the Dr.'s office, grabbed McDonald's...it's now 12:30pm...drop by the house to grab the stroller that i had forgotten and could have used the last 3 hours and then headed over to a NEW orthopedic.

whew!!!

got him fitted in his boot that he will need to where for the next 2 weeks. he can take it off for bedtime. he was hysterically crying and kicked, screamed, and fought as hard as he could to keep them from getting that boot on him. i was mortified as usual. my kids and Dr.'s/nurses manhandling them just never goes over very well. :) the nurse had to walk me to the car because he was still crying hysterically and refused to walk. kind of hard to get two kids to the car that way. :)

we made it. got home and after he started getting around he said..."me can walk, dis not too bad." in his cutie little voice.

another funny thing he said as Dr. Murnane was asking him "where it hurt" this morning...
he pointed EVERYWHERE to every little mark, scratch, scrape, or bruise showing her where it hurt moving from one leg to the other. he pointed to his right leg (the hurt one) and said "dis limp go over here a little in dis leg" pointing to the left leg. this is exactly why the FIRST Dr. should not have taken him at his word that it was his knee. the knee didn't even hurt him when you touched it and now it turns out it was the ankle anyway. good grief!

i'm thankful he'll be back to normal soon. i'm thankful more than i know how to express that we're dealing with something minor over here. i'm thankful i don't have to cart my children in and out of Dr.'s offices on a regular basis...exhausting. that is life for so many families. i'm thankful we got good news this time. i'm thankful we have insurance. i'm thankful the Lord answered my prayers. i'm thankful for times where i'm reminded of the many, many blessings in my life.

one good reason to clean out the pantry...

you might find a bag of rotten onions that you had no idea was there, laying amongst the empty plastic bags you've been stuffing under the bottom shelf for who knows how long.

good thing i got the random urge to clean out the pantry AND decided to act upon it.

an afternoon at Megan's

look at these sweet pea's!

Bella

Addison

Addison: "let me put my finger in your mouth Bella."
Bella: "OK, but i'm not promising i won't bite it." :)

Mila LOVES being with the baby girls. she is such a good helper!

i probably would have freaked out if kids carried Harrison around when he was this little. Addison and Bella are very used to be bounced around and dangled by their limbs. no biggie. :)

poor Bella...Jackson decided she should wear his camping light. :)

not too long ago, i headed over to Megan's for a little play date. you would have thought it was just for the girls. Jackson and Josiah were busy outside. they have the BEST yard and Jackson could be there all day i'm sure and never come in. lots of room to run and explore! Harrison missed out because he was at school. :( Camden was taking a nap most of the time we were there but when he finally woke up he was as precious as ever. i love that little guys personality. SO SWEET!

i always love being with Megan. she is such a dear friend to me and i'm always so refreshed when i leave. i only drink tea at her house and it's always the best! we sat and talked, i cried (which is not very unusual these days), drank tea, laughed at the little girls, i copied some yummy recipes. it was a great time. i'm ready to do it again.

let your yes be yes...

so tonight when we got home from our worship team picnic, Harrison announced that he wanted to get baptized.

it surprised me because we haven't talked about it all that much. not very much at all. i knew that when we did talk about it he would be very agreeable so i wanted to find a way to "talk" about it while not pressuring him. i wanted it to be his decision AND for him to do it for the right reasons.

i guess the Lord took care of that for me. i'm so glad He's so good about that. why do i ever worry about these things??? :)

the kids love to watch Bibleman movies that they get from the church library. the best way for me to describe these movies is that Bibleman is like a superhero who uses Bible verses to fight evil. they love it.

the boys were watching this in the car on the way home and when we got out of the car Harrison made his announcement. i asked him why he had suddenly decided that he wanted to be baptized. he explained that at the end of the movie, Biblegirl was talking about the verse Matthew 5:37 ...let your yes be yes, and your no be no... and how he wanted people to know that he had said YES to Jesus and that he was a Christian. He wanted everyone to know and wanted to be obedient to Jesus. He also said that he wanted to start telling his friends more about Jesus.

I LOVE THESE MOMENTS!!! while it is TOTALLY getting harder as these precious kids get older, it is getting more and more rewarding! we talked more about what it meant to be baptized and that he would need to give his testimony. he is not worried a bit about that part. so excited for him. he was SO excited he wanted to be baptized tomorrow! wouldn't that have been the most perfect mother's day present? :) i did have to explain that we would have to talk to one of the pastor's at church to find out when he could be baptized and that it wouldn't be as soon as tomorrow. he seemed OK with that. whew...don't want to discourage his enthusiasm. :)

we also talked more about his desire to share Jesus with others. how exciting! oh how i long to think more like a child. i have been burdened for my friends this year, more than i have ever been! we were able to talk about how important it is make sure we are doing what the Bible tells us if we are going to try and share Jesus with our friends. it was a GREAT way to remind him that people are watching him and if he is going to tell them that Jesus loves them and how much he wants them to know Jesus...he needs to make sure that He is obeying Jesus too. we were able to explain that if he tells people that he believes in Jesus and the Bible but doesn't obey his parents like the Bible teaches...people will question whether or not he really does believe in Jesus. and we were able to give other examples of this. we were able to tie in Jackson's "i just want to be a sheep...i don't want to be a hypocrite" song from Lambs and it CLICKED. don't get me wrong. if you are confused by this, we weren't trying to discourage him from sharing. but, it was the PERFECT opportunity to tie in some OTHER things we are working on with him.

it was SO exciting to see that light bulb go off! to have another reason for him to THINK about his actions and to be aware that he is an example and a witness to others for Jesus!

what a fun night for us as parents!

i won't lie. many of you know because i TRY to be open on this blog. things have been tough lately. they are STILL tougher than i really like to admit. i KNOW so much of this is "normal" kids stuff and i'm probably way more worked up about things than i should be. by the time Addison is 7 i'll have calmed down. right? maybe not, i won't have had a 7 year old girl before. :) but sometimes i feel like we are fighting for his soul over here! even though he's a Christian, there is SO MUCH at stake!

we are loving him to death over here and praying like we never have...for ALL OF THEM. he's not easily convinced. if he wants to say it's blue, and it's really red, but he wants it to be blue...it's blue to him. and he'll hold his ground. sometimes i'm talking and talking and he's shaking that head and i know he just doesn't get it, doesn't believe it, doesn't want it to be true. and he's ok that i'm telling him something different than he believes to be true. he's just gonna go on about his business. and i'm sitting there thinking...now what???

THESE can be great qualities i tell myself...one day. but now??? i'm still learning how best to respond to him.

but to see something CLICK tonight...how precious! how exciting! how thankful i am that God has his hand on this sweet boy. how thankful i am to know that the Holy Spirit is living inside him and teaching him things and revealing His truth to him and that no matter how hard i try he won't "get it" until the Lord prompts his heart and makes him ready! how thankful i'm NOT in control even though i try so hard to be!

so, we'll be working towards that next step. getting baptized. i think he just might be ready! :)

Black Band

it was a friday when Harrison returned from FL and friday's are pool days around here. so Jackson, Addison, and I picked Harrison up from the airport and headed straight for the pool. he was very excited to join us!

because of all the swimming he had been doing in FL, he REALLY wanted to try and pass his swim test. once he passed they would give him his black band. this is a necklace that you get to wear at all of the local YMCA pools and it shows the lifeguards that you are able to be in the pool by yourself AND you can do the fun slides.

he had to swim the length of the pool, tread water for 30 seconds, and then jump into the deep end, quickly turn around and swim back to the wall in the deep end.

Harrison did GREAT and passed! ms. emily is one of the lifeguards we see every friday and she was so exicted for him! WOO HOO!! now he can be in the pool without us AND will be able to do all the fun outdoor slides this summer! he is getting SO BIG!!! we are SO PROUD!!! :) and doesn't he look so dark???? he tanned up in that FL sun real quick! :)