accountability - update #3

***again, this is for my own personal record and accountability...knowing it's out there and visible. it's up to you to read and comment.***

i didn't update last week. i should have but i'll update two in one now.

last week up to this week:
had a slight setback with my knee. pushed myself a little too hard and too fast and payed the price.

last fri. - ran 14 out of 30min.
last sat. - ran 16 out of 30 min.
last sun. - ran 18 out of 30 min.
mon. - woke up with a hurting right knee. ran 12 out of 30 min. and thought my leg was going to just give out. called coach katy and she reminded me i needed to slow down and take it easy for a couple of day, had pushed too hard.
tues. - off
wed. - off
thurs. - did the treadmill and couldn't run very much, only got in about 3 2min. runs. leg still hurting but tried to push through.
fri. - ran 10 out of 30 min. in SO MUCH PAIN, thought i would never be able to run again and was completely and utterly discouraged. called coach katy and couldn't get her. called joe and he talked me through everything. cautioned me to stay off of it 2 more days, ibuprofen, ice, and check into my shoes.
sat. off
sun. off
mon. night - ran 10 out of 30 min. walk 4/run 2, felt good, iced and took ibuprofen that night.
tues. night - ran 12 out of 30 min. continued to try and pace myself and not push too hard. felt good, iced it.

today i'm sore but i think it's because i had to take so many days off last week. knee is feeling ok. feel a little tiny something but today is my day off so that's good. hopefully i'll start building up to this and i won't try to go to quickly. take my time and i'll get to the goal eventually.

it was very discouraging last week. i didn't want to lose momentum. i didn't want to gain all kinds of weight. even though i haven't worked out in years, i was convinced in one week i was going to get huge! i know it's silly but i so want to lose this weight so badly and keep it off forever! and the setback did a number with my head! i even ate worse than i should. you would think i would eat less or better to make up for the fact that i was having to stay off of my knee and yet i think i ate worse. i was in a funk about it. my mind is in a better place now and i'm trying to take it slow and easy and one day at a time. i think i feel like i have to will myself to be able to do this and it's hard for me to believe that i'll ever be able or capable of running a full 30 minutes without stopping when right now it feels like i'm taking such baby steps. i just am going to keep believing it will happen and just be as consistent as possible and hopefully by some miracle it will all come together.